This year I have re-examined my life a lot. I did a lot of stuff in the past from every PTA/committee going. This year a lot of stuff went out the window and I re-wrote my priorities.
Extracurricular activities were ditched on the whole and now one child plays football and does scouts, one child only does scouts and the last child does zero things apart from school (but has a part time job). I no longer run around after my children for anything. They are old enough to get themselves places/organise their own social events.
I don't help them a lot with school work and basically have little contact or involvement with any of their schools with the exception of a parent teacher interview. I paid school fees and for stationery and ignored most other requests for stuff/money. I did not attend one school prize giving (my school alone takes most of what I have to give). Their schools do zero Christmas related events/concerts etc either.
I resigned from the school board.
I started saying no to lots of stuff.
I started putting the immediate family of 5 first.
Now it is nearly Christmas. I've told family we are not buying many gifts for many people at all. I'm spending money/time/making stuff for just a few select people this year. I'm not in the Christmas mood as yet and have few gifts. I've told the boys not to expect much - they are fine with it. I told them it will be something they need, want, can read and wear. I even told my mother today that it would not bother me if Christmas was cancelled! The family event is supposed to be on Saturday and we still have not heard from my brother if he is coming. I'm sick of wasting money on stuff just because it is Christmas and stuff no-one in our families needs anyhow. We no longer buy presents for adults apart from our own parents.
The other thing is that I have banned myself from a major Westfield shopping centre metres up the road. This is not to stop me buying stuff (although I have not been buying much at all lately). This is because this shopping centre has bought up many houses in this neighbourhood (in a residential area) and got council permission to change the zoning. Westfield are going to destroy these houses and expand the size of the shopping centre by 70%. I've banned myself as I think they are evil for doing this to a residential area and they say that this construction will have a minor effect on the neighbourhood. Ha. We call them the Evil Empire. You can barely get near here on the weekends especially already due to traffic. Staff clog up my road and other roads parking all day long, so friends and family can not park at all. I'll shop at little independent shops if /when I need stuff. It is a pain to have to get into my car to go and shop. I won't even go to the supermarket anymore there. That is a real pain!! This has changed how I do things a lot too - I'm a month in on my boycott and don't miss much at all - it is stuff really.
I'm not busy. Neither of any of the schools ask for shared lunch a the end of terms. We buy
no teacher gifts. We have had only one end of year event (scouts) and
that is it. I'm at home with not a lot to do. No tree is up. A few other
decorations are. I guess my Christmas spirit will come. Few family
things are happening as virtually an equal amount of family live
overseas as there are left in NZ.
I'm good - it is great to ditch stuff (and people!) from your life, to not to be busy, to do what you want. I won't drive across town to do stuff if I don't want to and have been a lot more vocal with what I say/what I want to do as a family. I guess we just have changed priorities and looked after me too as a mum and wife. I've been very creative with craft and written a ton of letters around more university work and it has been a pretty good year. We deserve a decent holiday (I work very hard at school especially), so have booked a trip to Hong Kong too.
It is a good thing to live your life for yourself and your family!
You sound as though you are in a good place! Enjoy! Happy Christmas! xxReplyDelete
stepping back allows you to look at just what you are doing .. and what you want to be doing x Good for you .. hope a BIT of Christmas cheer filters in there though xxReplyDelete
Hoping the Christmas cheer has arrived but I do hear you regarding stuff stuff stuff from corporates ... I follow the need read wear eat want love philosophy too ... My kids are still a bit younger than yours so we are still in the middle of the magic. Work is chaos at this time of the year for me. Studies are over *phew*ReplyDelete
In the new year when my life has slowed down we will manage that catch up because I really want to !!!!!!
Hope you found some christmas cheer eventually Kimberley! I think it is good to re-order priorities sometimes, and putting immediate family first is always a good idea. I do believe that Christmas is what you make it, and I try to create christmas cheer with the tree, decorations, lots of candlelight, and special things to eat. Happy New Year when it arrives! XReplyDelete